Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Our fabulous new tv stand surrounded by moving mess.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Happy Halloween! Costume compromise above, my son will have to leave the mask off and the knives at home when he dresses up at school. We will have to help our daughter get her wings on, but her costume will pass the PC police's test and be acceptable for school. For trick or treating we'll let her wear a little glitter makeup.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Halloween Horror!

My children go to an oh so politically correct school, where they are limited in their choice of costume to the point of ruining my favorite holiday.

The rules are, no blood or gore, no bare midriffs, no makeup, no masks, no weapons no matter how fake.

The bare midriff thing would be fine with me, but they don't enforce it, so every year there are several Britney wannabes traipsing around in what I call slut in training outfits.

The makeup and mask limitation cuts out even the most basic costumes, such as clowns, Frankenstein's monster, vampires, etc.

The few ideas that don't involve makeup or masks invariably get the thumbs down from my 8 going on 16 daughter.

So, do I make a hula girl/belly dancer/mermaid and make her wear a pink leotard underneath so the midriff is covered? Do I pick a costume off the 9.99 rack at Walmart and tell her to wear it or go without? Or do I just give her a sheet and a pair of scissors?

Remember when 8 year olds wore Alice in Wonderland or Snow White costumes? Apparently 8 is the new 16, and 4 is the new 8.


Saturday, February 25, 2006

Ten Commandments for Riding the Bus

Thou shalt not bitch about the A/C when it is actually working. This is the Bay Area, bring a damn jacket just in case.

2. Thou shalt not vomit, urinate or otherwise foul the bus.

3. Thou shalt not loudly converse with fellow passengers, friends on cell phones, or thy driver. Profanity shalt be saved for private transit.

4. Thou shalt not curse thy driver when thou hast left thine abode too late to get to work on time. Buses runneth late due to traffic accidents and passenger delays, thine driver doth dislike being late as much as thou.

5. Thou shalt sit quickly upon boarding the bus, as every delay hath the potential to cause lateness. If ye needeth the lift, use it rather than hobbling slowly up the steps.

6. If thine driver is unfamiliar with the location ye seek, thou shalt not persist in asking for directions. Check with another driver or call the office. Arguing only causes lateness and ye receive faulty information.

7. Thou shalt not delay thy fellow passengers by slowly boarding, stalling while thine friends shuffle toward the stop, or any other tactic.

8. Thou shalt not giveth thy driver grief. Remember, ye are the one paying for a ride. I’m friendly, but not a goodwill ambassador. My job is to get you safely to your stop.

9. Thou shalt not ring the bell 10 feet in front of thy desired stop, nor 3 stops early.

10. Thou shalt not rummage around for bus passes or money in the doors. Ye know the bus is coming, be ready.

Bonus!!! 11th Commandment:

Thou shalt not spray perfume, deodorant, hairspray or any other noxious substance while riding the bus. While we're at it, if I can smell thy cologne from the back of the bus, thee use WAY too much. Ugh. Try bathing instead.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

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these are my kids' birthday bug cupcakes, made with licorice antennae and legs, fruit slice candy wings, gummy worm bodies, skittle heads and gumdrop spider bodies. Posted by Picasa
These are the works in progress for my 'bad girls' collage pendant. I haven't decided whether to go with resin or glass slides and solder.
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